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Vieraskieliset / In-english

Blog: Best ext­ra chro­mo­so­me ever

Vieraskieliset / In-english
26.3.2018 6.56

When we speak about a per­son who so­me­how de­vi­a­tes from the norm, we tend to un­der­li­ne how that per­son – des­pi­te his or her di­ag­no­sis – can read, do math, or sing so ext­re­me­ly well. How a child who has the same di­ag­no­sis as our son can speak and write flu­ent­ly in two lan­gu­a­ges. How anot­her such child was ful­ly pot­ty-trai­ned by the age of 2, and so on. These things are su­re­ly a cau­se of joy for eve­ry­bo­dy. We like to share hero sto­ries. We need them. But I am going to share a hero story that is a bit dif­fe­rent.

The child laughs hap­pi­ly, his half-moon ey­es scre­wed up. My own he­art be­ats so hard it could be jum­ping out of my mouth.

– You must not run away like that. You may get lost or be run over by a car, I pant squ­at­ting down next to him and hol­ding back te­ars of re­lief.

The child inc­li­nes his head and ta­kes hold of my hand. Ba­re­foot we slow­ly pad up to­ward home, and I feel my bre­at­hing gra­du­al­ly slow down. At the front door the child gi­ves me a qu­es­ti­o­ning look.

– Let’s go home and have a snack, I sug­gest.

– Yes, ple­a­se, he ag­rees hap­pi­ly.

He is al­re­a­dy thin­king about the here and now, while my own thoughts still lin­ger on the hor­ri­fying pos­si­bi­li­ties of what could have hap­pe­ned when he ran off on his own. What IF so­met­hing had hap­pe­ned? What IF the neigh­bor had not stop­ped his car in time? The free show of worst-case sce­na­ri­os con­ti­nu­es to play in my mind, though I am ab­le to act calm­ly.

When we go vi­si­ting friends, I run my eye over their home. The stairs are OK, the road has very lit­t­le traf­fic – but oh, the small child­ren of the ot­her vi­si­ting fa­mi­ly are pla­ying on the floor. And alt­hough my hus­band and I take turns kee­ping an eye on our son, he ma­na­ges at some point to make a bloo­dy scratch on the lit­t­le girl’s cheek. When as­ked to do so, he hap­pi­ly apo­lo­gi­zes, but I keep as­king my­self: Why? Why does he so­me­ti­mes hurt smal­ler child­ren? On­ly a few ye­ars ago, when he was about 4 ye­ars old, he was him­self still pla­ying on the floor, a char­ming lit­t­le boy with lo­ve­ly ey­es. Af­ter­wards, I qui­et­ly speak to him about the in­ci­dent. He pres­ses his hands over his ears and withd­raws in­to his pri­va­te world, cur­led up on the floor. I sigh and gent­ly stroke the stub­born cur­ve of his back. How I wish I had more un­ders­tan­ding with you, I think. Dear He­a­ven­ly Fat­her, give me enough wis­dom to live with this child, I plead in my eve­ning pra­yer.

When we talk about pe­op­le who de­vi­a­te from the norm in some way, we too of­ten ge­ne­ra­li­ze.

– Down pe­op­le are so hap­py and friend­ly.

– Au­tis­tic pe­op­le do not know how to make con­tact.

– ADHD pe­op­le are so rest­less.

Some ge­ne­ra­li­za­ti­ons are true, at le­ast of­ten. But qui­te a few are not. It is good to re­mem­ber that we all are pri­ma­ri­ly hu­man beings with our strengths, we­ak­nes­ses, and di­ag­no­ses.

Our child oc­ca­si­o­nal­ly ut­ters a ”sen­ten­ce” of a few words, mi­xing Fin­nish and Eng­lish, but he is cer­tain­ly not tal­ka­ti­ve. When or­gan ac­com­pa­ni­ment be­gins, he does not sing but pres­ses his hands over his ears and may growl a lit­t­le – there is too much noi­se for his over­sen­si­ti­ve per­cep­ti­on. He le­ar­ned to sit on the toi­let bowl when he was 7 ye­ars old, but he is still in di­a­pers. He does not tell me he would like to go to the bath­room.

But ear­ly in the mor­ning, this child walks from one bed to the ot­her, hug­ging, kis­sing, and wis­hing good mor­ning with hap­pi­ly twink­ling ey­es. He has time to won­der about a snail on the yard, feel de­ligh­ted about a bal­loon, and be over­jo­yed about a sum­mer­ti­me trip to the be­ach. He is hap­piest when sur­roun­ded by his fa­mi­ly, and his great sen­se of hu­mor ma­kes us laugh our he­ads off. For us, he is the su­per­he­ro of his life. He is im­por­tant for us as a spe­ci­al hu­man being. He has that one ext­ra chro­mo­so­me – the best ext­ra chro­mo­so­me ever.

Text: Sa­ri­an­na Suo­mi­nen

Trans­la­ti­on: Sirk­ka-Lii­sa Lei­no­nen

You will find the ori­gi­nal Fin­nish blog post here.


Jee­sus sa­noo: "Koot­kaa it­sel­len­ne aar­tei­ta tai­vaa­seen. Siel­lä ei koi ei­kä ruos­te tee tu­ho­jaan ei­vät­kä var­kaat mur­tau­du si­sään ja va­ras­ta. Mis­sä on aar­tee­si, siel­lä on myös sy­dä­me­si." Matt. 6:20-21

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