Text: Helmi Yrjänä
Translation: Sirkka-Liisa Leinonen
A few days ago I was biking around the town. There is nothing special about biking, but it was special that I was not wearing my earpods. I was only listening to my own thoughts and things I could hear around me. I heard so much birdsong that I did not even hope for anything more to listen to.
In the winter I practically always had my earpods on while walking. I listened to music, podcasts or audiobooks. The times when I forgot or just chose to leave my earpods at home were rare exceptions.
I remember well one time when I walked without earpods. I only meant to walk to the nearby mailbox to mail a letter. When I turned to go home, I received a message about a parcel that was waiting for pick-up a couple of kilometers further than where I was. I decided to go and pick it up right a way. At first I regretted I had not taken my pods. But it turned out that during that walk my thoughts provided the best possible company for me. My thoughts were so cheerful and happy that I walked nearly the whole way with a broad smile on my lips. I also seemed to reach my destination in no time even without anything to listen to.
For a long time during the winter, I was seldom able to enjoy the company of my own thoughts. I did not feel comfortable spending time with myself. When I was with other people, I usually concentrated on the situation and the people rather than the bustle going on in my head.
I had a hard time being alone. Silence made me feel anxious. When there was nothing or no-one to keep my thoughts in check, they bundled up, growling and gnashing their teeth under the stress. Whenever I was alone, I had something on to listen to. I did no necessarily listen properly, but the background sound soothed my thoughts. I was aware this was a problem, but there was nothing I could do about it.
Prolonged stress and fatigue affected my nerves so badly that even something trivial could make me cry. This sensitivity to cry was controversial. I felt I needed people, but I was easily offended by things they said, though they meant nothing bad. It was frustrating to be in the company of people who were dear to me and yet to end up hiding and crying somewhere, tired and alone. I am grateful for my sensitivity, but such a stressful period of life would have been easier if I had been less sensitive.
Let us now return to the biking trip I was talking about at the beginning. As I was returning home, I biked through a park, stopped there and sat on a swing. I listened to the gabble of seagulls and watched the clouds slowly moving across the sky and the people passing by, and I suddenly realized that I felt really good. It was a relief to be completely at peace with my thoughts without any stress. It was also comforting to realize that I was so well aware of my own condition that I realized things had improved. After that biking trip I was able to verbalize that feeling of mine as being pure happiness.
Although I had a hard winter, I also experienced happy moments and found many causes for gratitude in my evening prayer every night. But I had not felt such lightness and relief for a long time. It seemed the spring had finally found its way into my mind, dusting all corners and opening the curtains to sunlight. Right now I feel happiness that bubbles and bounces inside me, pouring out irresistibly. Being alone, I have not been able to show it to anybody face to face, so I have talked to my camera and shared the videos. I hope I have also shared a few overflowing drops of my happiness with you by writing this.
Vanhustenviikon teemana on tänä vuonna ”Yhdessä luontoon – joka iän oikeus”. Viikon mittaan luontoteemaan syvennytään erilaisista näkökulmista, kuten lähiluonto ja ulkoilu. Esillä on myös muita tärkeitä teemoja ravitsemuksesta kulttuurin merkitykseen. Monen aiheen kohdalla herää kysymys, miten nämä asiat tällä hetkellä toteutuvat ikäihmisten elämässä.
Ekaluokkalaisen Liinun syksyyn mahtuu niin iloja kuin suruja. Kutkuttavaa jännitystä tuo salapoliisitehtävä tädin ja isoveljen kanssa.
Tämän vuoden ajankohtaiskirjassa käsitellään omakohtaista uskoa ja sen vaikutuksia ihmisen elämään ja toimintaan.
Miten selvitä, jos tulee satutetuksi ja jätetyksi?
Voiko seurustelu alkaa ihan noin vain, yllättäen?
Entä mitä tapahtuu siinä välissä?
Kiinnostava matkakertomus seurojen järjestämisestä ja uskovaisten elämästä Afrikassa.
Jännittävä hevoskirja herättelee pohtimaan, minkä varaan elämää kannattaa rakentaa.