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Vieraskieliset / In-english

Blog: Half of my life

Vieraskieliset / In-english
13.9.2020 7.10

Juttua muokattu:

11.9. 15:42

On May 13th this ye­ar my hus­band had spent half of his life with me. For me, that mi­les­to­ne date was al­re­a­dy in No­vem­ber last ye­ar. I had on­ce cal­cu­la­ted those da­tes just for fun, but in the bust­le of dai­ly life I had for­got­ten my own mi­les­to­ne date.

Yet I kept in mind my hus­band’s mi­les­to­ne. Ear­lier in the win­ter I plan­ned that we could have a nice wee­kend to­get­her. We could le­a­ve the child­ren with a ba­by­sit­ter and do so­met­hing fun, just the two of us. But the tiny vi­rus shot down my plans: there were no ba­by­sit­ters avai­lab­le. We the­re­fo­re had to be more cre­a­ti­ve about our ce­leb­ra­ti­on of the fes­ti­ve date.

Half of one’s life sounds like a long time. Ul­ti­ma­te­ly, ho­we­ver, ha­ving star­ted courts­hip qui­te yo­ung and ha­ving mar­ried soon af­ter that, we will li­ke­ly spend much more time to­get­her than on our own, if that is God’s will. In my pra­yers I of­ten ask that God would grant us a long life to­get­her. It seems im­pos­sib­le even to ima­gi­ne life wit­hout the tho­rough­ly fa­mi­li­ar com­pa­ni­on by my side.

The pain­ful se­pa­ra­ti­ons among our friends re­mind us that we should not take a good spou­sal re­la­ti­ons­hip for gran­ted. We should rat­her ac­ti­ve­ly nur­tu­re our re­la­ti­ons­hip with ten­der­ness and com­pas­si­on, to­get­her for­gi­ving and as­king for for­gi­ve­ness. One per­son can­not alo­ne sal­va­ge a mu­tu­al re­la­ti­ons­hip. We can al­so pray for he­alth and a safe life. So­me­ti­mes one of the spou­ses is ta­ken away through a di­se­a­se or ac­ci­dent so ear­ly that, from the hu­man view­point, the ot­her spou­se’s life re­mains se­ri­ous­ly in­comp­le­te.

I am sure that there are mo­ments in each long mar­ri­a­ge when one qu­es­ti­ons the sen­se and va­lue of the re­la­ti­ons­hip. I re­mem­ber how, in a mee­ting with my the­ra­pist many ye­ars ago, I comp­lai­ned how dif­fi­cult it was to live with my hus­band, won­de­ring if we had even been me­ant to each ot­her. The the­ra­pist as­ked me how we had met.

I be­gan to tell her a long, me­an­de­ring story full of oc­cur­ren­ces and coin­ci­den­ces. When I said, ma­y­be for the fifth time, how ”things had been me­ant to go”, I sud­den­ly re­a­li­zed so­met­hing. If things had gone the way I had me­ant them to go, none of those coin­ci­den­ces had ta­ken place. The He­a­ven­ly Fat­her’s hand had been ar­ran­ging things long be­fo­re our paths cros­sed. I am qui­te sure that we re­al­ly were me­ant to meet and to take hold of each ot­her’s hands. To walk this path to­get­her, to car­ry each ot­her, to bat­t­le and rest to­get­her.

While tel­ling the the­ra­pist about how we had got to know each ot­her, I be­gan to smile. My voi­ce be­ca­me sof­ter and war­mer and my ey­es be­gan to shine. I re­cal­led mo­ments that had ta­ken place de­ca­des ago. The fee­lings of frust­ra­ti­on and di­sap­point­ment, the brit­t­le la­yer of ice around my he­art mel­ted away then and there, and my bit­ter te­ars dried up. All those things were rep­la­ced by over­po­we­ring ten­der­ness and gra­ti­tu­de. When I met my hus­band la­ter that af­ter­noon, I hug­ged him hard and told him about my ex­pe­rien­ce. I am sure it al­so touc­hed his he­art. Our will to love and res­pect each ot­her was on­ce again re­ne­wed.

And how many ti­mes it has been re­ne­wed sin­ce that! I have so­me­ti­mes said that the ex­pe­rien­ce of fal­ling in love again with one’s spou­se is much bet­ter than yo­uth­ful pas­si­on. When my hus­band co­mes home ear­lier than ex­pec­ted or walks to­ward me ac­ross a car park, my knees seem to go soft and my he­art be­gins to beat fas­ter. There you are, the one that was gi­ven to me by God! Thank you, dear He­a­ven­ly Fat­her!

Text: Pau­la-Maa­ria Itä­nie­mi

Trans­la­ti­on: Sirk­ka-Lii­sa Lei­no­nen

You will find the ori­gi­nal blog post here.


Sinä tah­dot si­sim­pää­ni to­tuu­den – il­moi­ta siis mi­nul­le vii­sau­te­si! Ps. 51:8

Viikon kysymys


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